~Cursed Conversations~

The following conversations were between me and the eight year old brother of Eamon's friend while we were all taking Ziggy for a walk:

Henry:  "Sometimes I curse and say bad words.  Kind of.  Just kind of.  I know Eamon's dad says curse words because he was in the Navy."

Me:  <laughing>  "Um, something like that.  But you weren't in the Navy so what's your excuse for cursing?"

Henry:  "Well, my mom taught us things like cursing and starcasm*. 

Me:  "Oh, really?"

Henry:  "Yeah, I think she taught us the wrong things."


*Although he pronounced it as starcasm, he meant sarcasm.  And I'm pretty sure his mom didn't intentionally teach him to curse! ;) 

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Later on our walk...

Henry:  "I really like this walking-around thing with your dog.  Do you think if you all get tired of Ziggy that we could have her?"

Me:  <laughing>  "Um, sure, if we get tired of her, she's all yours."

Henry:  <seriously>  "Great!  So will she come with the leash or will we have to buy one?"

Me:  "Well, if we ever got tired of Ziggy and gave her away, her leash would come with her..."

Henry:  "Yes!"

Me:  "But, buddy, I have to warn you, we've had Ziggy for nine and a half years.  If we haven't gotten tired of her by then, I don't think we will." 

If only he'd been alive to ask that question about nine years ago... ;) 

~Confused Conversations~

From June 29, 2011, courtesy of Facebook Memories (when Eamon was six):
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Me: "Eamon, why is there a dried puddle of ice cream on your [kids] table!?"


Eamon: "Oh, I didn't know." 


Me: "You didn't know? How could you not know there was a giant puddle of ice cream there?"


Eamon: "No, I didn't know I was supposed to clean it up."


I am obviously failing as a mother if he has made it to 6 and didn't know he's expected to clean up a puddle of ice cream! 

~Green Lantern Conversations~

This conversation was from June 25, 2011, when he was six, (after we'd visited Heroes Con in Charlotte, NC), courtesy of Facebook memories. 
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Eamon just informed me that when he feels unable to use the restroom, he just puts on his Green Lantern ring and then he's able to! I guess that ring was money well-spent after all...?

~Marital Conversations~

After attending last night's vigil for the victims of last year's Pulse night club shooting, a discussion about marriage equality came up...

Me:  "...and that's why everyone should be allowed to marry the person they love."

Eamon:  "Yeah, and people can marry tortoises too if they want!"

Me:  "NO!  No, we are not having that discussion again!  Tortoises - and pigs - are not part of the marriage equality discussion.  We are talking about one consenting adult HUMAN marrying another consenting adult HUMAN.  Got it?"

Eamon:  <grinning sheepishly>  "Yeah.  But what did you mean that we're not having that discussion again?"  

Me:  "Because we had this same discussion several years ago and you argued passionately in favor of people marrying pigs if they wanted to because pigs are really smart."

Eamon:  "I did?"

Me:  "Yes, I even wrote a blog post about it."

Eamon:  "Of course you did.  

~Pooped Conversations~

From June 8, 2011, Courtesy of FB Memories

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~This morning's car conversation~

Eamon: "When are you going to wash my water bottle?"

Me: "I just washed it this morning."

Eamon: "Well, it smells like elephant poop every day."


I can't even imagine what he was putting in that water bottle that it would smell like elephant poop.  Or that he would know how elephant poop differs from the smell of, say, emu poop?

Stumbling Conversations

From June 4, 2011, Courtesy of FB Memories

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As I was stumbling over Eamon's toys, trying to leave his room in the dark after bedtime stories.

Eamon:  "Shhh! I'm trying to have some sleep!"