~Milked Conversations~

Morning conversation with  six year old Eamon from Oct. 30, 2011, courtesy of Facebook Memories
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When I told him to get the milk out...

Eamon: "Is this the milk with fat in it?"

Me: "We're out of 2%. The skim will be fine for you today."

Eamon: "But I need milk with fat in it. You and daddy can drink the milk without fat because you already have lots of fat." 

~Smashed Conversations~

Courtesy of Facebook Memories, October 21, 2011

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~Morning conversation w/ 6 year old Eamon~                       (after having problems w/ an electrical system in our house)

Eamon: <sighing> "I think we should just smash it."

Me: <choking back laughter> "No, honey, I think we'll fix it instead."

Eamon: "We should smash it. And I know where we can get a bunch of hammers."

~Lost In Translation Conversations~

Courtesy of FB Memories October 13, 2011, musings from six year old Eamon
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~Today's car conversation w/ Eamon~

Eamon: "My friends grandparents live across the sea and speak Europe."

Me: "You mean they live in Europe? There are a lot of countries in Europe so if they live in Spain they might speak Spanish..."

Eamon: "No, mommy, people in China speak Spanish."

~Handy Conversations~

Courtesy of Facebook Memories, October 2, 2011
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After "accidentally" spilling yogurt smoothie onto his hands...

6 yr old Eamon:  <rubbing hands together>  "It's actually kind of like hand sanitizer." 

Me:  "Um, no. It's actually kind of not like hand sanitizer!"

~Third & Quartered Conversations

While discussing what Eamon learned in school today...

Eamon:  "So today, in Social Studies, we talked about the amendments."

Mark:  <knowingly> "Amendments to what?"

Eamon:  "Um, America?"

Mark:  "The amendments to America?  Are you sure?"

Eamon:  "Something about the Constitution?"

Mark:  "Ok, amendments to the constitution and then what?"

Eamon:  "Well, we had to pick an amendment and then draw a picture of it so I picked the 3rd amendment about not quartering soldiers."

Me:  "Cool!  <punnily>  But they can still be drawn, right!?"  

Eamon:  <innocently>  "I drew them being quartered!"

Mark and I:  <realization dawning>  "Wait, what?  Did you turn that in already?  We need to see that."

Mark:  <trying to choke back laughter> "Um, ok, good attempt, and good vocab skills by the way but 'quartered' has several different meanings and in that case it meant to house the soldiers.  People couldn't be forced to house the soldiers."  

Eamon:  "Oh."

Mark:  <still failing in his attempt to choke back his laughter> "Um, you're going to have to redo this.  But you should still show it to your teacher.  He'll... appreciate this."  

Aww, poor Eamon's vocab skills landed him in a little bit of trouble with this assignment.  ;) 

"No Soldier shall, in time of peace be quartered in any house, 

without the consent of the Owner,       

nor in time of war, but in a manner to be prescribed by law."

~Sneaky Conversations~

Courtesy of Facebook Memories from September 15, 2011
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After sneaking up on me this morning to scare me...

Eamon:  "I'm quiet like a ninja! But only when I just wear underwear. My shorts make too much noise." 

~Blu Conversations~

Courtesy of Facebook Memories from Sept. 14, 2011
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~Tonight's Eamon conversation ~ 

Eamon: (after seeing an ad for a new straight-to-blu-ray Lego Star Wars movie, marketed directly to the kids of course) "We should buy this!"

Me: "We don't have a blu-ray player."

Eamon: "Well, you can buy that too!"

Me: *getting exasperated* "We don't have the money for a blu-ray player!"

Eamon: *rolls eyes* "Fine, I'll buy one! Um, mommy, do I have enough money for one?"

~Bedtime Conversations~

Courtesy of Facebook Memories from August 20, 2011
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Bedtime conversation with 6 year old Eamon...

Me: "Oh, no. I forgot to put clean sheets on your bed, Eamon. Let me just..."

Eamon: *sigh* "I guess I'll just sleep on the floor tonight." 
<lays down on pile of stuffed animals on the floor>
 
Me: "Or I could just put them on now...!"

Eamon: "Ok, wake me up when they're on."

~Wise Conversations~

Courtesy of Facebook Memories July 10, 2011
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~Words of wisdom from 6 year old Eamon~ 

Eamon:  "Always don't blame me for stuff."

~Heavenly Conversations~

I was telling Eamon about one of my Duo Lingo Spanish lessons, on flirting of all things. Apparently, cheesy pick up lines aren't just for English speakers...

Me: "It translates to something like, 'Is Heaven missing an angel?'."

Eamon: <not impressed> "I've got a better line, 'Are you an angel? Because I'm allergic to feathers! <vomiting noises>"

Yeah, I think we have a few more years until the hormones kick in. ;)

~Cursed Conversations~

The following conversations were between me and the eight year old brother of Eamon's friend while we were all taking Ziggy for a walk:

Henry:  "Sometimes I curse and say bad words.  Kind of.  Just kind of.  I know Eamon's dad says curse words because he was in the Navy."

Me:  <laughing>  "Um, something like that.  But you weren't in the Navy so what's your excuse for cursing?"

Henry:  "Well, my mom taught us things like cursing and starcasm*. 

Me:  "Oh, really?"

Henry:  "Yeah, I think she taught us the wrong things."


*Although he pronounced it as starcasm, he meant sarcasm.  And I'm pretty sure his mom didn't intentionally teach him to curse! ;) 

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Later on our walk...

Henry:  "I really like this walking-around thing with your dog.  Do you think if you all get tired of Ziggy that we could have her?"

Me:  <laughing>  "Um, sure, if we get tired of her, she's all yours."

Henry:  <seriously>  "Great!  So will she come with the leash or will we have to buy one?"

Me:  "Well, if we ever got tired of Ziggy and gave her away, her leash would come with her..."

Henry:  "Yes!"

Me:  "But, buddy, I have to warn you, we've had Ziggy for nine and a half years.  If we haven't gotten tired of her by then, I don't think we will." 

If only he'd been alive to ask that question about nine years ago... ;) 

~Confused Conversations~

From June 29, 2011, courtesy of Facebook Memories (when Eamon was six):
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Me: "Eamon, why is there a dried puddle of ice cream on your [kids] table!?"


Eamon: "Oh, I didn't know." 


Me: "You didn't know? How could you not know there was a giant puddle of ice cream there?"


Eamon: "No, I didn't know I was supposed to clean it up."


I am obviously failing as a mother if he has made it to 6 and didn't know he's expected to clean up a puddle of ice cream! 

~Green Lantern Conversations~

This conversation was from June 25, 2011, when he was six, (after we'd visited Heroes Con in Charlotte, NC), courtesy of Facebook memories. 
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Eamon just informed me that when he feels unable to use the restroom, he just puts on his Green Lantern ring and then he's able to! I guess that ring was money well-spent after all...?

~Marital Conversations~

After attending last night's vigil for the victims of last year's Pulse night club shooting, a discussion about marriage equality came up...

Me:  "...and that's why everyone should be allowed to marry the person they love."

Eamon:  "Yeah, and people can marry tortoises too if they want!"

Me:  "NO!  No, we are not having that discussion again!  Tortoises - and pigs - are not part of the marriage equality discussion.  We are talking about one consenting adult HUMAN marrying another consenting adult HUMAN.  Got it?"

Eamon:  <grinning sheepishly>  "Yeah.  But what did you mean that we're not having that discussion again?"  

Me:  "Because we had this same discussion several years ago and you argued passionately in favor of people marrying pigs if they wanted to because pigs are really smart."

Eamon:  "I did?"

Me:  "Yes, I even wrote a blog post about it."

Eamon:  "Of course you did.  

~Pooped Conversations~

From June 8, 2011, Courtesy of FB Memories

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~This morning's car conversation~

Eamon: "When are you going to wash my water bottle?"

Me: "I just washed it this morning."

Eamon: "Well, it smells like elephant poop every day."


I can't even imagine what he was putting in that water bottle that it would smell like elephant poop.  Or that he would know how elephant poop differs from the smell of, say, emu poop?

Stumbling Conversations

From June 4, 2011, Courtesy of FB Memories

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As I was stumbling over Eamon's toys, trying to leave his room in the dark after bedtime stories.

Eamon:  "Shhh! I'm trying to have some sleep!"  

~Recorded Conversations~

From March 19, 2012, Courtesy of FB Memories

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~And now the best part of the recorder conversation~

Eamon: "This is so cool that I have TWO instruments now!"

Me: <half joking> "Maybe you could learn to play them at the same time?"

Eamon: "How could I play the drums and the recorder at the same time? B/c I need two hands for both of them. Oh, I know! I'll build two mechanical arms and attach them to my spine and use them to play one of the instruments! I just figure out how to build the mechanical arms..."

Me: "Or I was gonna' say that you could just use your feet to work the foot pedal and your hands for the recorder..."

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This was either foreshadowing his desire to be an inventor or he'd just been watching a lot of Spiderman vs. Doc Ock at the time! ;) 

~Ferreted Conversations~

After bringing home the class ferret, Khloe, I thought it would be fun to let her run around in a room with Eamon and his two sleepover buddies.  Little did I know...

Me: <watching Khloe start to pounce on and *playfully* bite the socks and pants legs of the two boys>  "Um, what is she doing?  That doesn't look like playful biting..."

Eamon:  "Oh.  Yeah, she does that at school too."

Me:  "Does what at school?  Bites people?"

Eamon:  <nonchalantly>  "Well, yeah, she's a biter."

Me:  <envisioning having to explain to the parents of the sleepover kids why they need stitches and rabies shots>  "WHAT?!  You tell me that NOW?!"

Eamon:  "I thought you knew?"

Me:  "No, I didn't know!  Boys, get out of the room NOW!  I will get her back in the ca..."

Sleepover Kid Who Doesn't Have Pets:  "I can help.  I really don't mind being bitten."

Me:  "Your mother will mind you being bitten!  Get out of the room!"

Sleepover Kid Who Doesn't Have Pets:  *sigh*  "Okay..."

Later after telling Mark about the Khloe incident...

Mark:  "You didn't know that she bites?"

Me:  "NO!  Why would I?!"

Mark:  "Well, she's a ferret.  That's kind of what they do."

And they wonder why I drink... ;) 

No ankles were bitten in the making of this blog post.

~School Break Conversations~

From February 5, 2012, courtesy of FB memories
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Me: "Sweetie, you may not know this but you have a week-long school break coming up. How would you like to spend it?  At the children's museum?"

Eamon: "The whole week...?!" 

Me: "Yeah, does that sound fun...?"

Eamon: *gasp* "I'm so happy I thought I was gonna' cry!"

~Doomed Conversations~

January 14, 2011 (courtesy of FB memories)

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This morning's car conversation... 

Eamon: "Mommy, I am DOOMED!" 

Me: "Why are you doomed?" 

Eamon: "I am doomed b/c I dropped my green crayon on da' floor!" 

Me (laughing): "You are so funny!" 

Eamon: "No, I really did drop it on da' floor." 

This kid... ;) 
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