Downward Facing Conversations

Things you don't expect to hear while doing yoga, even when it's with your 10 year old...

Eamon:  "Ow... my face."

Me:  "What the...?!"  <looks up to see that Eamon has taken downward-facing-dog to heart and has landed face down on his mat with his butt in the air>  "You still have 10 minutes left of mandatory yoga time so quit drooling on my mat and get back to it." 

Delayed Conversations

Yesterday while checking the calendar...

Eamon:  <excitedly>  "Today is May 23rd so my birthday is just TEN days away!"

Me:  "Funny you should mention that..."

Eamon:  "Why?"

Me:  "Because you were supposed to be born today eleven years ago."

Eamon:  "What?!"  

Me:  "Yeah, they estimated this as your due date but you hung on until June 2nd."

Eamon:  <horrified>  "Ten days?!"

Me:  "Yep."

Eamon:  "That is a LONG time..."

Me:  "Yes.  Yes, it is!  Don't you forget that!"

Eamon:  <looking especially traumatized b/c his class just had "the talk" from the school nurse on Friday> 

Beaned Boy Conversations

After a trip to the public library...

Eamon:  <voraciously reading a new book in the car>

Me:  "Wow, I haven't seen you this into a book in a while.  What's it about?"

Eamon:  <absently>  "Uh-huh..."

Me:  "And it's about...?"

Eamon:  <absently>  "A boy..."

Me:  "Okay..."

Later while talking to Mark about the book...

Me:  <excitedly>  "Wow, that must be some book he's reading!  <imagining my genius child reading the 5th grade equivalent of War & Peace>  He hasn't even put it down since he found it!"

Mark:  <nonchalantly>  "Yeah, it's some comic book about a kid whose superhero power is farting so much that he flies."

Me:  <dreams of early admittance to Harvard being dashed>  "WHAT!?"

Mark:  "Yeah, no wonder he loves it..."

Me:  "Eamon is your book really about a boy whose super power is GAS?!"

Eamon:  <scowling>  "No!"

Me:  "Well, what's it about?"

Eamon:  "It's about this boy and he eats beans and... he's the sidekick!"

Me:  "But he flies because of his flatulence!?"

Eamon:  <frowns and goes back to his book>

Oh, well, what could I have expected from a book called The Adventures of Beanboy?! 

Sweetened Conversations

Last week while I was suffering from a cold...

Me:  <coughing incessantly>

Eamon:  <concerned>  "Are you OK?"

Me:  "Oh, yeah, I'll be fine.  Thanks."

Eamon:  "I could make you tea."

Me:  <laughing a little at the thought of me, the caregiver, becoming the caregivee!>

Eamon:  "Well... do you want me to make you some tea or not?"

Me:  "Ok, sure.  Thanks, buddy."

Several minutes later, after only some of the boiling contents of the kettle ended up on the counter...

Eamon:  "Ok, the tea is steeping and I set the timer so we'll know when it's ready."

Me:  <pleasantly surprised>  "Wow, thanks!"

Eamon:  "But you have to get your own honey because I don't know how sweet you want it."

~Milked Conversations~

After an intense vacation planning marathon, during which time I really should have been doing homework...

Me:  <excitedly>  "Ok, Eamon, I think that does it!  I think I've got all the travel reservations made finally!"

Eamon:  "Really?"

Me:  "Yep, the last hostel's been booked, the bus ride, the car rental... I think we're good to go!"

Eamon:  "Cool!  I'm starting to get really excited now!"

Me:  "Yeah?  Awesome!  What part are you looking forward to most?"

Eamon:  <thinking>  "Ummm... the ice cream."

Me:  <coming down quickly from my travel-planning buzz>  "What?!  Not the castles, the ferry ride, the natural rock formations... Still, just the ice cream!?"

Eamon:  "Well, I've never had Irish ice cream before."

Me:  "You've never had Irish anything before."

Eamon:  "But still, I bet it will taste different."    

All I know is, for what we're paying to get to Ireland, to apparently do nothing but eat ice cream, that cow better milk itself, churn the ice cream, AND bring it out to us in a Waterford crystal dish!  ;)

~Fasted Conversations~

After eating a late breakfast yesterday morning...

Me:  "You need to get off the computer now and do some chores."

Eamon:  "Ok.  What time is it?"

Me:  "10:30."

Eamon:  <matter-of-factly> "Ok.  I'll eat lunch in 30 minutes."

Me:  "What?!  You JUST had breakfast 30 minutes ago!"

Eamon:  <plaintively>  "But I gotta' eat."

Me:  "Every hour?"

Eamon:  "Yeah."


We are going to be in so much trouble when this kid hits puberty full-on! ;) 

~Rivaled Conversations~

This conversation is actually from April 17, 2011.  Thanks for the memories, Facebook! ;) 

Today's Car Conversation w/ (5 yr old) Eamon:

Eamon: "I don't like 'dat 'da car in front of us likes Clemson. 'Cuz we like CVS."

Me: "You mean USC?"

Eamon: "Oh yeah."

CVS, USC, same difference, right?  

I mean, up until last year, Eamon thought that 

USC stood for United States of Columbia. ;)