~Dr's Office Conversations~

While at the Dr's office for a VERY minor cough...

Eamon:  <sighing pathetically>  "I hope that one day <whimper> I won't have this cough any more..."

Me:  <laughing at his melodrama>

Eamon:  "What!?  I've had this cough for many, many months, Mommy."

Me:  <laughing harder>

Eamon:  "WHAT!?  I've been coughing since 2012!  And my heart huts..."

I suddenly realized that if he continued to lay it on this thick, the doctor might send us for an EKG, MRI, spinal tap, and any other test they could charge lots of money for...

Me:  "Hey, you know what?  This room would be an awesome practice spot for your 4 Directional Block move that you need to practice for Tae Kwon Do!"

Eamon:  "Really?"

Me:  "Yeah!  You should totally practice that." 

Eamon:  "Ok!  <completes the martial arts form>  Did you know that I can fight four people at once with that move?!"

Me:  "Really?  Awesome!  If you're fighting four people at once, you need to be really fast so now practice that as fast as you can possibly go!"

Eamon:  "Ok!"

Me:  "Now show the doctor your move."

Eamon:  "OK!!"

Doctor:  <five minutes later>  "His heart sounds perfect.  Give him some allergy meds and he'll be fine." 


Successfully avoided the EKG/MRI/spinal tap combo once more - parenting win!  ;) 

~Knowledgeable Conversatinos~

While discussing reading...

Me:  "Can you believe some people don't like to read?"

Eamon:  "Ok."

Me:  "Eamon, seriously, can you believe there are people out there don't like to read?!  Isn't that weird?"

Eamon:  "Ok."

Me:  "Quit answering 'Ok' to everything I say!  I'm asking you a question.  " 

Eamon:  <sighing>  "I don't know the answer to everything, Mommy."

Ok, well, the kid's got me there! ;) 

~Movie Conversations~

While getting ready to drop off a DVD...

Me:  "Hey, do you know where the movie is so we can take it back?"

Eamon:  "What movie?"

Me:  "You know, the one we watched last night?"

Eamon:  "You mean 'Three Black Men'?"

Me:  <blinking>  "Um, no, it's called 'Men in Black Three'!"

Eamon:  "Oh, right..." 

~Fatherly Conversations~

While walking the dogs at the park and hearing someone - or something - pass gas...

Mark:  "Ziggy!" 

Eamon:  "Daddy, that was not Ziggy.  It was you."

Mark:  "Son, the first rule of being a guy is that if you pass gas and there's a dog nearby, always blame the dog!  They can't defend themselves."

Eamon:  "Ohhhhh..." 


Also, I'm betting the dogs don't care if they get blamed for that. ;)

~Dig this Conversation~

After noticing a few new holes in the yard, I saw Max starting yet another one...

Me:  "Max!  No digging!  Bad Max! NO!"

Eamon:  <patiently> "But, mommy, digging is Max's life." 

Me:  "What?!  No, eating and getting his butt rubbed and fighting with Ziggy are Max's life." 

Eamon:  "But after those things, digging IS Max's life."

Me:  "Maybe.  But if he wants to continue to have a life, Max better stick to his already-dug holes..." 

~Coffee Conversations~

As Eamon was explaining in detail how to make coffee to his aunt, who just happens to be a barista...

Erica:  "Do you make coffee a lot?"

Eamon:  <very put upon> "Yes.  I do EVERYTHING for them."


Which is funny because when he DOES help with the coffee making, it's usually because he has begged and pleaded to do so!  ;)

~Mealy Conversations~

A few days ago, my cousin Jessica very graciously sent the fam and I some loot from the year that she taught English in South Korea.  Among the treasures was a can of mealworms - for eating.  Unfortunately the mealworms are past their sell-by date - or else Mark and Rowan totally would have tried them - so for now they're just a fun conversation piece.  Eamon, however, had other ideas...

Eamon:  "Mommy, when we can take the mealworms outside to release them?"

Me:  "Release them?  Honey, they're dead."

Eamon:  <looking stricken>  "Is it because I've been shaking the can?"

Me:  "What?!  No!  Sweetie, they were already dead."

Eamon:  "Oh.  Is it because they didn't put any air holes in the can?"

Me:  "Well, yes, that would do it but, see, they were dead before they went into the can."

Eamon:  <confused>  "But why would they put dead mealworms in a can?  I think they would have been alive if they had put air holes in the can." 

Me:  *sigh*